• What is virginity?
• Do you have what it takes?
• Enter... the partner
• The perfect first time
• The truth about vaginal intercourse
• Orgasm aid

Don't get me wrong, I like vaginal intercourse so what I'm trying to do here is not to get you fed up with the whole thing, but to show you that there are countless other ways to obtain sexual pleasure.

Vaginal intercourse is thought to be the ultimate proof of love, the merging of souls, but I don't know if vaginal sex will make your partner love you more and I can't guarantee that it will give you any of the pleasure it's said to give you.

This “vaginal intercourse is everything you need to do to make your woman happy” mentality has lead mostly everyone to believe that vaginal intercourse is all there is to sex, and as a consequence, other sexual techniques that don't imply the penis being inserted in the vagina are being overlooked, not given the credit they deserve.

Many people engage in vaginal intercourse for all the wrong reasons.

One reason is they want to prove to themselves and to the world that they are adults, because, after all, that's what adults do right?

I mean, don't all adults have sex, so why shouldn't we?

The thing about vaginal intercourse is that before you try it you have expectations about it, so when it actually happens, you might find the expectations you had not to be realistic.

You might find out that it didn't make your partner love you more, that it didn't make you love him more, you might even find that it's not such a big deal after all.

Many people find out that adulthood is just out of reach. No one tells you when you've become an adult, and what's worse you can't even tell yourself when you have become one. You want to be an adult, but end up chasing adulthood all your life.

So where am I trying to get? Well, I'm trying to get to the fact that having vaginal intercourse will not make you feel more “grownup” and it will not make you become an adult in your eyes, and in anyone's eyes for that matter.

The truth about vaginal intercourse is that though it is a form of receiving and giving pleasure, in most of the cases the man will be the only one to experience orgasm in the process.

One of the most popular misconceptions about vaginal intercourse is that the woman has mind blowing orgasms when her partner puts his penis inside her. After all, that's what we see in all the movies and hear about from most people.

But what happens when a woman finds no pleasure in vaginal intercourse or can't have an orgasm that way?

My guess is that she'll probably start to lie about it. And who can blame her? No one wants to say “I never had that”, or “That never happened to me” not just about sexual issues, but about everything in life.

So the “best” alternative for a woman who does not experience pleasure/orgasm during vaginal penetration is to lie. To please her partner, to seem mature, normal and to “look good” in front of their partner.

But lying gets you nowhere, and if the woman lies about having an orgasm, the poor sucker to who she is lying will go on doing the same thing that he thinks gives her an orgasm.

But it's very likely that when a woman does not receive pleasure/orgasm during sex she will most likely stop doing it.

The clitoris is the primary erogenous area for women, for the sole reason that it's filled with nerve endings. The vagina on the other hand, has a lower density of nerve endings and for that simple anatomic reason it can not give women the same pleasure when stimulated as the clitoris does.

Vaginal orgasm can be obtained by the stimulation of the female prostate gland. Clitoral and vaginal orgasms are two different things and being able to experience clitoral orgasm does not automatically mean that the woman experiences vaginal orgasms. Nor does it mean one should believe that one type of orgasm is better than the other.

Clitoral orgasms are, as far as I know, the most common ones. This should not make the women who do not experience clitoral orgasm feel in any way less women or less capable of living a happy and normal life.

Vaginal orgasm as I said, comes as a result of stimulating the female prostate gland. But most men either don't know about it or don't care about it... or can't reach it.

Most of the times, vaginal orgasm has been blocked by women, because just before orgasm it gives the urge to urinate.

There is no absolute rule about vaginal intercourse. Some women like it and experience orgasm when their vagina is stimulated, other women don't find anything “amazing” about it and don't experience pleasure during it and some women like vaginal intercourse but don't experience orgasm or at least not during all the vaginal intercourse activities.

As with everything in life, you can't know if you like it until you've tried it.

Vaginal intercourse is no different. You can experiment before engaging in vaginal sex with a partner, but it's highly unlikely you'll find out from experimenting alone if you like vaginal intercourse or not.

Who good vaginal intercourse feels is influenced by many factors like: the lubrication of the vagina, the size and shape of the partner's penis, the strength of the pelvic muscles, emotional involvement etc.

How good vaginal intercourse feels is also dependent on vaginal sensitivity. Some women have a higher vaginal sensitivity than others.

The vagina is more sensible in the first outer third, to touch and friction, the inner two thirds are less sensible than the first third and are most likely sensitive to pressure.

Sensitivity is also influenced by the changes in hormone levels, medication and birth control pills.

So that means each woman may enjoy different types of vaginal stimulation at different times. It also means that women like different types of vaginal stimulation while some women don't like any type of vaginal stimulation.

No matter what the case is, no woman should feel embarrassed with her likes and dislikes where vaginal penetration is concerned.

It's a question of body and mind

Though in some cases it is true that the size and position of the clitoris can influence the potential for orgasm this is not necessarily true for all women. The size of the clitoris does not influence the quality of the orgasms or the frequency at which they occur, nor does the distance between the clitoris and vagina.

Also, the moves of the labia were thought to provide enough stimulation on the clitoris during vaginal intercourse. That's not necessarily true for all women since not all women have the same shape and size of the inner labia.

The thrusting penis might not even come in contact with the labia during vaginal intercourse, since the labia is closer to the clitoris than it is to the vagina.

If this type of indirect stimulation occurs it's not likely it will last long enough or intense enough to result in an orgasm.

Also, the vaginal orgasm is just that... the stimulation of the G – spot, not the clitoris or the labia.

As you might have noticed, sex is no longer something only you and your partner are involved in. Now it's the whole wold's business when you do it, with who, how, how long it takes.

And parents are the first ones to join this “group activity” by the fact that they impose their will on when you should start your sex – life. Then, when you do have a sex – life the mass – media comes in to tell you how, when, where, how often, with who you should do it.

All that pressure on you to “perform” as you're told might result in you finding little or no pleasure in intercourse of any kind.

The nerve connections that make things work sexually are the ones between your genital region and the brain.

If you've been taught that touching your vagina or clitoris is bad and you shouldn't do it, you either did it in spite and noticed it actually feels quite good, or didn't do it and don't want to believe that it can feel good.

Disassociation means that your vulva/vagina/clitoris are not consciously connected with your brain.

That can happen if you were not permitted to explore your genitals as a little girl and were punished if you did it.

If you were taught to deny or ignore what you feel “down there” you'll most likely be unable to experience any pleasure when you're finally allowed to acknowledge that in some circumstances it's OK to be touched there... most likely that will happen on your wedding night.

But you might notice that you don't feel anything, or that you only feel pain. That happens because your body and brain don't know how to interpret and transmit the nerve impulses from and to the genitals.

You might not feel a thing when you are touched or you touch yourself because the nerve impulses get to the brain, but the brain doesn't know what to do with them. Since the “pathway” the sexual nerve impulses were not used, they're weak, so you might feel little or nothing when you are stimulated.

Normal sexual development must be let take its course, not be messed with or prevented. A healthy and happy sex – life depend on that.

If this happened, then you might want to get to know your genitals. You can do that by self exploration.

It's a good idea to know your genital area to begin with.

Then you can start stimulating the vulva, clitoris and vagina, and to see what you are doing you can use a mirror.

The self stimulation can be very useful but you need to be focused on the point you are touching.

If you feel comfortable using a dildo then use it, but it's better if you begin by using your fingers, they can give you lot more feedback than a dildo can.

If you expect results you will get them, but don't expect them to come too soon. Since your body and brain are unfamiliar with sexual sensations they will need some time to get used to “the new”.

You don't have to tire yourself, but you mustn't expect to feel like heaven the first time. The best thing you can do is to repeat the stimulation sessions every day for about 5 to 15 minutes.

Another “question of mind” where sex is concerned is the emotional state we're in. The brain triggers a more intense state of arousal when the emotional involvement is big. That happens when we have sex with a partner we love, a partner we find attractive or with a new partner. During puberty arousal is also present because the hormone levels are sky high.

When we are really excited our body releases hormones which travel to our brain and stimulate it, giving us a state of euphoria. That chemical reaction makes us feel good and gives us the ability to experience pleasure at a higher level.

Since the hormones are released while we have sex it would be safe to say that we could go on forever if our body would not experience exhaustion.

Some women find vaginal intercourse very stimulating... well, their brain does... and that, rather than the physical stimulation makes them have vaginal orgasms. It's not the pleasure, it's the thought about the pleasure, or about who they are having vagina intercourse that actually triggers orgasm.

So remember the brain is very important in deciding if a woman enjoys vaginal intercourse.

Arousal can occur even if physical stimulation is absent. For example, men have around 6 erections during sleep, women get aroused only by fantasizing about a sexual experience or encounter.

Orgasm however, is not so easy to come by without any physical stimulation.

If you ask me, pleasure and orgasm are dictated in equal parts by emotional and physical stimulation.

Also, to obtain vaginal pleasure and orgasm some women need to be stimulated not with a penis, but with... her or her partner's fingers, a vibrator or anything that produces pleasant sensations.

Most women need direct stimulation of the clitoris to obtain an orgasm. If stimulation doesn't occur orgasm might not occur either. It's very important to know that for most women, clitoral stimulation is also required during vaginal intercourse for them to experience orgasm.

Since during vaginal intercourse the clitoris can't be stimulated by the partner's tongue, the best bet you have is to use the fingers and hands to massage the clitoris.

stu
i will give it a try. thanks :)

Alex's answer:

We would advise you to direct your husband to the Penile Fitness Online Male Enhancement Course.  The exercises are easy to follow, and your helping him would likely motivate him.

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