How to achieve female orgasm

No two women are the same just as no two men are the same.
If you know how to please one woman it doesn't mean you know how to please all the women on the face of this planet.

The real bummer is that no one but your lover can teach you what she wants/likes.

Not even me.

The stuff I write on this particular section is coming from my experience with women. Of course, some things remain the same from one woman to another, like the need for love and affection, but when it comes to sexual satisfaction I can only say I know how to please a limited number of women, the women I was with.

So you're probably wondering what can you do if everything that's been said about pleasing women is just general stuff?

My best guess is that you should ask the woman you're with. She should know what she wants and what best works for her.

If the woman you're with and want to please doesn't know what she wants, either because she has never masturbated or because she has never had sex with a partner it's your duty as a man to help her discover what she wants, what she needs. You should do this only with her accord and in a gentle way.

But remember, a woman's needs change in time. All the changes in a woman's life reflect in her sexual needs. If it's her menstrual cycle or pregnancy, even the loss of a loved one, every single event in a woman's life makes her want and need something else.

Now let me ask you a question: What do you think is the best way to learn something?
Did you learn how to write just by looking at books? No you didn't, you made exercises.

I'm not saying that you should take your partner to the gym, I'm saying that you need to set aside what you know for a while and do some discovering.

Treat your lover's body as a new and beautiful exploring territory. Learn how to please her as if she is the first woman you're with. Explore every part of her body with your eyes, your body, your hands, your tongue. Ask her what she likes, show her what you think will bring her pleasure, ask her if she likes what you're doing to her.

Don't worry if you sometimes fail, or you're embarrassed or frustrated. That happens only for you to learn that pleasing a woman is not as easy as it seems, and besides, failure only makes you enjoy success.

Now let's talk a little about what should happen when the woman does experience orgasm. In spite of what women think, men sometimes don't know when a woman has an orgasm, and I explained why.

So the ideal is for her to tell the man that gave her the orgasm that she enjoyed the whole lovemaking experience and that the orgasm she had was fulfilling.

There also the possibility that the man might think the woman had an orgasm when in fact she didn't. This can happen because during sexual arousal the woman might cry out or her vagina might contract, and the man might think those were the signs of an orgasm and stop stimulation.

This can result in satisfaction for the man thinking he gave his woman an orgasm and in the woman being left unsatisfied.

So what can you do about it? As a man... not much, after all you're entitled to think that your woman had an orgasms if you noticed the signs... as a woman you can simply ask your man not to stop. It's as easy as that.

It might happen that the woman wants an orgasm and her parter doesn't give it to her.
What can be done then?

The best thing I can think of is that the partners should talk about what happened and why the orgasm didn't �make an appearance�.

The woman must explain that she wanted an orgasm but she didn't have one. She must also tell her partner that this isn't the �end of the word� but that she would me much happier if she had had an orgasm. She mustn't be insensitive to her partner's feelings but she must be totally honest about her feelings. She might also want to tell the man why she thinks she didn't have an orgasm and suggest what he can do to give her one next time.

The man must (MUST!) not freak out about it. This can happen and it has probably happen to hordes of men before. He must listen to what the woman has to say and explain what happened. Maybe he was too tired, maybe he thought she had an orgasm. Or maybe he just doesn't know how to give her an orgasm.

So what I'm saying is that the couple should talk about the �failed� experience so that they can turn it into a learning and understanding experience for both of them.

Just so that you know, orgasm is not the only purpose to be pursued while making love. Orgasms can come after a short period of sexual stimulation. That doesn't mean that every sexual experience should be a race towards orgasm.

You might find out that the winners are the ones who take their time to reach orgasm. I discovered that the longer the time dedicated to foreplay the longer and more powerful the orgasms are.

Not just that, but how log can an orgasm last? A few seconds... compare that to the prologued stimulation not only of the genitals but also of the whole body.

Orgasm is not the only pleasure in life. Some women live perfectly happy lives and have never experienced orgasm.

Of course, it does give you an amazing feeling while it lasts, but after all, if you only want an orgasm you can get it by masturbating.

Making love should be more about pleasing each other than reaching orgasm.
The orgasm should be a gift from one partner to the other, made with love and attention.

COMMENTS

jim
hot article!

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